Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
