can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
