oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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