Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Randomize
