Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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