I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Randomize