If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
