I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
