OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
The air taste purple.
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