All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Randomize
