sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
