How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
