when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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