if i died would you start the facebook group?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
