WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize
