I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
