Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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