I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
