C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
