he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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