In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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