that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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