Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
