Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Randomize
