i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
