FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
