Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
