Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
soo... how was my night?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize