Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
