He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Randomize
