Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
