I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
