dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
