at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
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