you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
