Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
