Small penises have feelings too.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
