I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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