Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize