The brown eye won't let me do that either.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Randomize
