Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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