Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
