I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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