I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
