so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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