we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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