Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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