3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
