But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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