so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
