guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
